Caterpillar in the tree how you wonder who you will be?

I love this song by Miley Cyrus.It has been the symbol for many of us with disabled children.Waiting for our little caterpillars to come out of  their cocoons and emerge into that beautiful butterfly God wants them to be.

Those cocoons are in the form of varying disabilities.They can be anything from seizures,Cancer,Down Syndrome,inability to walk or talk or think normally,really anything that makes your child stand out from the crowd and labeled as special needs.

Ariel used to be such the picture of health.Then around the age of 9 her medical problems started.This is her life story video for anyone that hasn't seen it and it will show you why this song has special meaning for us.

http://youtu.be/XBknrihEISY

The past several days have been more of a tangle in the perpetual cocoon that we call disabilities.

Ariel came to me Tuesday night crying in pain, doubled over and vomiting.I could tell this was not her normal Irritable Bowel Pain.I drove her to the E.R.After getting there and the doctor seeing where her pain was and her urine testing positive for blood he ordered a CT scan.

After the CT scan I was told she had a kidney stone and then later I was told she had two.She was in severe pain.

Then there were hours and hours of fluids and I.V.'s pushed through her to flush her system.

They seemed to control her pain with Tordol.She was antsy and anxious to go home.I wanted to go as well,but was afraid of how she would tolerate the pain.She was looking good and feeling good at the hospital.

They only gave her one dose of pain meds by mouth and then sent her home,mainly because she wanted to go.But my fears are coming to realization,being in the hospital is far different than being at home.She's in a tremendous amount of pain again and I'm going to have to call the hospital again and see if she will need to be admitted back.

We will see how the night goes,whether she can maintain at home or have to go back in.I'm so tired of seeing my little caterpillar struggle all her life.I get so tired of seeing so much of her life spent dealing with pain and discomfort.I want to see her break free of this cocoon and be able to spread her wings.